If you work with me, I am going to ask
“do you have a therapist & when was the last time that you chatted with them?”
Working through your relationship with food, often means working through your relationship(s) with others, specifically your parents.
Perhaps growing up you have heard:
- “Make Mommy happy and eat all of your food; I worked hard to make it for you”
- “You are not leaving the table until you finish your food”
- “You seem sad; what is a food that will make you feel happy?”
- “Great job on your report card! What would you like to eat for a treat?”
- “There are starving children in China that would love to eat that food”
- “If you eat [insert healthy food] then you can have some [“unhealthy” food]”
- “Your sibling always eats so well, why don’t you?”
- “I can’t play with you right now; have a snack until I am ready”
All of these statements carry emotional baggage and impact a child’s attitude toward food & nutrition but most importantly our bond with whomever is making these comments.
For example, a child would hear:
“the more that I eat, the more proud you are of me”,
“you love my sibling more because they eat their food”,
“anytime I eat a vegetable, I deserve a treat”
..and a framework for dis-ordered eating can easily be established from here.
I help my clients navigate through these learned beliefs and thought processes.
When we understand our thinking, we can understand our behaviour.
We then understand why we yo-yo diet, why we binge eat, why we miss meals, why our body size is connected to our self-worth!
Working with a therapist can allow you to dive deep into your childhood to help you re-parent and unlearn behaviours & habits that are holding you back in living our best life!
And if you are reading this and have heard yourself say these statements to your kids, know that it is not too late to rephrase your statements around food to your kids.
Let me know what comment(s) apply to you and I can provide some affirming statements that you can try.
May you be nurturing your complete self,
in Body, Mind, & Spirit,
Naomi Law, RHN
Registered Holistic Nutritionist